Surrender

In studying manhood with some of my male students at school, we have finally come to the topic of love.  Specifically, love as it pertains to our female counterparts, however the same message applies to most any relationship.  Love is always on the mind at some level; whether we long for lasting friendships or an intimate relationship, we are all thirsty for love.  The trouble is that we are humans, and we cannot love perfectly, or unconditionally, like Christ does.  Yet that is our mission. 

Guys and girls, the only way that we can fully know this love, and express this towards one another, is to be in complete surrender to God.  Allowing him to love through us, as willing servants of his perfect plan. 

I Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.   Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always, hopes, and always perseveres.

Love is patient and kind.

Surrender your will.  You can believe that love is a waiting game.  There is a time for love (especially as it relates to the opposite sex), but it is not just a waiting game.  We are simply imperfect people who are learning to love one another, and that my friends, takes patience.  When we let others down, or when others let us down, we should always respond out of patience and kindness.  How else are we to learn, how else are we to ever meet anyone’s expectations?  Just as Christ loves us, he is patiently waiting for us to understand.  He is never irritated, frustrated, or upset.  No, He kindly waits for us to know His love. 

Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Surrender your pride.  Love is not about me, and the moment it becomes that, it is no longer love.  Grace is not about us, but it is for us.  We are not saved by anything other than God’s love through grace.  We have nothing to boast about, because we do not deserve the love we are given, and still we take it for granted.

Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Surrender your emotions, feelings, and attractions.  Love is putting the condition of another’s heart above the condition of your own.  Knowing that people are imperfect, and people will disappoint, we cannot for a moment assume that we can use love for any self-gain.  The moment we do that, love becomes terribly destructive. 

 

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth.

Surrender your mind.  Love is honest, and it cannot grow in the midst of lies and manipulation.  More than anything else, love is faithful…  When God promises, He delivers.  This is the same for us, let your yes be yes, and your no be no.  Be consistent, if you say you will do something, follow through.  Likewise, do not commit to promises you cannot keep. 

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

Surrender control, it is not by our power or will that we can love someone to this magnitude without first surrendering control. This is just one of the amazing truths about God’s love, it does not expire.  God is constantly pursuing us with love, regardless of whether we choose to love Him in return.  In a relationship, we need to fully commit to loving that person in their imperfectness, just as God loves us.  Godly love looks to protect the heart and well being, just as God wishes to keep us from harm and suffering through his guidance and provision. 

What does this mean in our relationships?

When looking for relationships with the opposite sex, there is one simple truth: to be able to love anyone else, especially the one we care for the most, we must love Jesus more…  we must surrender to the Love of Christ.  As humans trying to love, there will be heartache and pain because we still struggle with sin (pride, anger, control, and selfishness), but you must commit fully to loving with the same love that Christ has for us.

Brothers and sisters in Christ, do not settle for less than God’s best.   Be in constant preparation, and do not give your heart away carelessly.  Hide it in Christ, so that when it is found it will be found and established in Him.  We have created a cycle of broken and empty relationships, and we both have to work together to break this pattern.

Brothers, pursue Christ first and foremost.  Commit to protecting the hearts of your sisters in Christ.  Stand up for them, and encourage them towards what true love is.  Only when you are in complete surrender to Jesus, should you pursue a woman’s heart.  Remember, you are to love her with the same reckless abandonment as Christ has loved you in your imperfections. 

Likewise, Sisters, pursue Christ first.  Protect your heart, do not give it away freely; stand strong in God’s promises to you.  Know your worth and value as daughters of God, and encourage your brothers in Christ to become Godly leaders.

May we love as Christ loves us, may we be in complete surrender to Him.

You're Responsible: Read With Care

Last post I shared a bit of my heart, and how there are not enough young men stepping up into leadership roles and pursuing manhood…  and that there are very few older men out there investing in the young males of today.  However, I’ve started a new book call The Divine Mentor, by Wayne Cordeiro, and I feel like I missed a few key points and I want to make sure that Pastor Wayne gets full credit for many of the thoughts contained in this blog post.  While I was pretty rough on the guys last week, I think you girls should pay attention as well.

To start, what is the root of the problem for boys and girls today?  Is it that there aren’t enough males and females pouring into our youth?  Are parents to blame for doing everything for their children and never letting them learn how to live life on their own?  Is culture telling us that we should behave one way, when the Bible may suggest differently? 

Perhaps. 

But like all problems, there are usually many factors that will influence the outcome, but only one solution that we can control…  ourselves. 

Aspiring men and women, you and I have a choice to make no matter what our circumstances may be.  Are we taking care of our own responsibility to grow ourselves?  Or are we waiting for someone else to take over this responsibility for us?  This is the first step in addressing any of life’s problem- understanding that we are responsible for our own development. 

This does not mean that those we come in contact with will not heavily influence who we become.  But if we have a problem, we need to be the first to respond. 

We are not living in a State Farm commercial folks.  If you want a hot tub, then you better earn it. If you wish to be mentored, then you need to go find someone to mentor you.  If you need positive influences in your life, seek them out.  If you are not being fed spiritually, then open your Bible.  Do not sit and think that because you need guidance, or you need a mentor, that one will just pop out of thin air.  Guys and girls, we need to initiate the process of becoming men and women of God by understanding that it is our responsibility to grow ourselves… and we cannot expect others to do it for us. 

Yes, I do believe that God will provide us with plenty of relationships to help guide and lead our growth.  But if a problem presents itself, first think about what we can do to address our problems, and not wait for others to come along and solve them for us. 

Oh, and when there are no “mentors” readily available for us, why do we not look to the mentors of scripture that have been available to us for thousands of years?  Men, look to Moses, Joshua, David, Nehemiah and save yourself a lot of pain and suffering by learning from their mistakes and their successes as leaders appointed by God.  Women, why not look to Ruth, Esther, and Mary and see how you are to passionately pursue the love of God first and foremost? 

The bottom line:

MEN understand that we are responsible for becoming real men of God, and that even if there is no one here to tell us how, it is our duty to pursue manhood regardless.  We need to seek the answers to our many questions, expecting that they will not get answered until we pursue truth on our own. 

WOMEN understand that while men are responsible for their own development, you too are held to the same standards.  Look to the love of our Father first to fulfill your need for love, not from young men who do not fully understand how you should be loved.

Proverbs 4:7

Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.

Life Giving

“Manhood is life giving.  Masculinity is best expressed when it is here for others.”
-Robert Lewis

What I have been convicted by lately is the extreme lack of males in leadership, especially spiritual leadership.  Men, please look around and tell me that these things are not true of our “masculinity”:

·      we don’t want to stir emotions

·      we don’t want to ruffle any feathers

·      we avoid conflict at all costs, the things we want are about our own personal success and well-being

·      we are perfectly okay in partially committed relationships

·      we do not understand the fragility of the female heart (we never fully will, but I’m talking about the complete disregard for the caring of a female heart)

·      we certainly don’t want to be held responsible for any of the fore mentioned issues… 

Okay, all of these may not apply to you, but I know there has to be at least one that does.    

Let me first say that I am not innocent of any of the charges, but I do desire change.  At our Men’s bible study last week we read an article the referenced Robert Lewis’ book, The Quest for Authentic Manhood.  One of the points he made about being Godly men is that we are purposed to give life, not take it. 

Now even if you aren’t taking life, it does not automatically mean you are living a life that is focused on the eternal either.  It is very easy to focus on finite goals, things that are just temporary and insignificant.  But in order to give life our hearts need to be awakened to things of eternal value.

I know it is easy to talk about, but let’s get going men.  As we pursue God, the things that make our heart hurt are the same things that hurt our Father’s heart. 

Guess what?  These issues of heartache are also issues of life, and giving life.  Meaning, these things of conviction hold significant meaning for the lives of others, especially when we act on them.  And that is exactly what we are called to do, act. 

What does that mean? It means that failure to act will not bring life to others… and we’ll continue to live as passive boys who don’t want to bother anyone because it is “not our place”.  Men, it is our place!

Convictions will be different for all of us, as God has a different plan for you than he does for me. As for myself, my heart hurts that our society is filled with boys who do not want to become men, or have very few men to teach them how… and I want to encourage a life that challenges them to discover what true masculinity is (while I pursue manhood for myself as well). 

I realize this posting has not given any real answers as to how to give life, the truth is I am still learning that myself.  But for starters, let’s stop focusing for one second on what our goals and dreams are, or how we are going to get the hottest girl, biggest house, and the fastest car, and let’s start focusing on the convictions placed on our hearts by God.  Come on boys, it’s time to be men… it’s time to give life. 

“So it is written: “The first man Adam became a living being”; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit. 

I Corinthians 15:45

Can't find my keys...

Today I left my keys hanging in the door of my car for the better part of five hours as it waited for me just across the street from the Circle K on Belmont Boulevard.  Don't worry, none of the hundreds of people training for the marathon today felt the need to quit when they saw my "free" ride sitting there on the side of the road.  Needless to say, after class my car was right where I had left it, and so were my keys.


I hate to admit this, but today is actually the second time I have done that careless act this month (and in nearly the same exact place).  While I don not believe there to be many people looking for a free car, or a sample of whatever may be inside, to be walking down Belmont Boulevard... I find it comforting to know that someone would be willing to take the time to remove my keys from the door, use an old assignment of theirs from some audio engineering class to wrap around my keys, and then leave them "hidden" for me under my windshield wipers with a nice little note.  Incredible.


Yet, I don't feel like this story would have had the same warm and fuzzy ending had I been this careless back in Los Angeles.  But I still believe that people are inherently good, and today was just a simple reminder of that awesome truth.  You can say we have been born into sin, or remind me that we have a sin nature about us, but we are still created in God's image.  Which I believe is partly reflected in all the goodness we see in the world, such as my audio engineer friend from today.  

But more important than arguing the topic of whether people are inherently good or bad, serving others out of kindness helps remind others of the God image we were created in.  Some call it paying it forward, others call it love, I think it is just how God intended us to live when he created us in His image.  

So here is to the little things in life, specifically those that remind us of God's great goodness we were created in. 

You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
C.S. Lewis

Ears to Hear

How does God speak to you, personally?  For me it can be through people and experiences.  In fact, this blog post has been inspired by my pastor's message from two weeks ago, which I feel is very relevant to what has been on my heart.  But aside from hearing God through people or experiences, I feel God speaks to me most through strong convictions.  I do believe God can speak using plain English (or whatever language you speak best), but I have yet to experience this “audible” voice of God for myself.  Regardless of how God speaks to you, it is good to understand that God is speaking to you. 

For the rest of this journal, or for as long as you wish, the moments in which you believe God speaks to you will represent your metaphorical “ears” in which you hear God. 

Revelations 3:22

He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

The first thing I think of when I read this verse is that I have two ears, one more than just “an ear”.  Fortunately for me, it doesn’t mean that I am twice as guilty when I fail to hear God speaking in my life.  Still, ignoring God’s call or voice in our life is often the easiest thing to do, but it is never the best thing for us.  Rarely are the best things in life easy to come by; you should anticipate difficult challenges, uncomfortable conversations, radical living, and having to think intentionally every step of the way.

In my last posting, I wrote about how strong feelings and convictions should receive special attention, well I’ve got a little bit more to say about dreams, visions, listening, and actions versus inactions.

Revelations 3 is most famous for discussing the topic of “lukewarmness”.  While I am not going to focus on what it means to be lukewarm, I intend to focus on listening (which still has a lot do to with remaining in a lukewarm state or moving out of it).  To be a useful tool for God we have to be able to listen when God is speaking.  When we struggle with complacency, urgency, listening, or even usefulness, we struggle with lukewarmness.  But don’t worry; God never stops pursuing us when we lose sight. Doubt may set in, and we may fail to obey. Struggling to carry out strong convictions, understand strong feelings, or trust God’s vision for our life is something that will happen.  However, even when we fail to act God is still standing at the door of our lives knocking, waiting for us to listen and respond (verse 20), “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.” 

The next question is, “are we listening?” 

This is the part I struggle with the most, I can spend hours talking to God about all of my problems and transfer immediately into a grocery list of request, but never once do I stop and just listen.  I have “ears”, I know when God is speaking to me, but I still find it difficult to allow God the opportunity to speak before I interrupt with more concerns.  Fortunately for me, Jesus will knock for an eternity if that’s what it takes to get my attention…  I hope that’s not the case.

So here is the good news: when we finally learn to listen and respond to the Lord’s callings in our lives, Jesus promises us this (verse 21), “To him who overcomes, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne.”

If you missed that part, let me give you play by play- God does not stop loving or pursuing us, still we are reminded that all who have "ears", have been called to act on the strong convictions that are of God...  and even though we will struggle and face adversity, those who overcome have been invited to the throne of our Father in heaven, sharing this seat with Jesus.

AMEN ("GLORY" and "HALLELUJAH" are also acceptable responses to this amazing truth).

Pure Innocence

When you were younger, what did you always want to be when you grew up?  It’s okay, no one will make fun of you for bringing up your old childhood dreams… I won’t have any of that on my blog.

For me, I always wanted to be a detective, or an FBI agent, I was always drawn to puzzles and mysteries… some days I wanted to be a pro-athlete, soccer mostly… other times when I felt a little more adventurous I dreamt of being Indiana Jones, a Ninja Turtle, or even Peter Parker (That is Spiderman for you old folks)…  But that was back in the day when we were able to dream, encouraged to dream.  Now, I have this feeling that I’m too old to dream… that I have to think “rationally” and refrain from stirring emotions, why?

Why is it that as adults we no longer dream?  Where has our “pure innocence” gone?  

I know I’m not the only one, but somewhere in this adult transformation I learned to be rational, limited, and boring.  Every time we dream our ideas our challenged by our friends, family, and even ourselves. 

What happened to dreaming big?  What happened to being the change we wish to see in the world?  Are we really that okay with our comfortable lives that we’ve lost all reason to dream big, and dream often? 

It’s okay; I’m not going to be entirely pessimistic tonight. In fact, I do believe that adults are still capable of dreaming, and dreaming big.  We may not dream in the same elaborate fashion that we used to when we were young, but we still wish to see change in the world… and we still feel strong emotions toward these changes. 

If you are feeling strong emotions, it’s my inclination to say that those are feelings that are not meant to be ignored.  Instead, those feelings should receive extra close attention.  When God calls us to move we will feel that desire to move strongly.  And knowing that these emotions were placed in your heart by God requires action, no more waiting for the next person…

It’s time to dream again, and it’s time to take action.  The first steps might seem so insignificant, and sometimes it is so hard to simply get started, but getting started is the part where people fail far to often.

The bottom line:  Dream big…   Dream often…  Get started....

(Credit to Grant for reminding me to “dream often”, props roommate.)

I Found God… in the Red Light District

Yesterday was the culmination of too many amazing encounters, I just had to stop and put these thoughts on paper.  And if you are confused by the title of this post, don’t worry, just keep reading and it will all make sense.

If the amazing weather, great company, and an incredible day spent outside climbing at Foster Falls wasn’t perfect enough…   It got even better when shared with new friends, and what seemed to be nearly half of my student staff.  Even though our group started out as four, we ran into another small party of ours early in the afternoon and met some new friends not long after.

Ally, Sam, and @JacuiBA were taking Kaley climbing outside for her 18^th birthday. We stopped to chat, I sang “Happy Birthday” in Espanish, and then made our way towards the Red Light District (The name of a small section of wall at Foster Falls) where we were going to eat lunch and wait our turn to get some climbing in.  It wasn’t too long till the girls made their way towards the Red Light District as well, where we to ran into more friends from Chattanooga.  Finally, after eating a quick lunch… we spent most of the early afternoon climbing, enjoying good company, and talking about God.

So there I was, ironically enough, in the “Red Light District”… climbing a route called “Timeless Christian Values”…  and listening to my student staff share in an incredible conversation about Christ with some friends we met only an hour before. I heard conversations of God’s faithfulness and provision, as well as some incredible facts about the Bible and some of its “hidden” messages.  With all this going on, I sat there thinking about all of the incredible people I’ve met within the last few weeks and could help but sit there completely amazed at this Spirit of God that brings complete strangers together in amazing community.  

While getting ready to hike out Andrew made a comment that this day was probably the closest thing he has experienced to heaven on earth… I may just have to agree.

------

Oh how I love talking to people about God, even listening to others talk about God makes me “smile real big” inside.  I don’t know if anything else brings me more happiness than when two people who have spent absolutely no time together can talk for hours about the goodness of God.  It reminds me of the unity that Paul talks about in Romans 15.

“May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.” 

The bottom line… God is faithful, that is all there is too it.  He is so many other amazing things as well, but in my life (and I bet in yours too) he has most certainly been faithful.

This last month I’ve been asking God for “community”, and his response to these prayers has been incredible… I guess finding God in the Red Light District really made me realize just how faithful God has been this last year.  Special thanks to all who’ve been able to share in these amazing experiences, you guys have truly been a testament to God’s faithfulness in my life.

Romans 15:5-6

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.