Surrender

In studying manhood with some of my male students at school, we have finally come to the topic of love.  Specifically, love as it pertains to our female counterparts, however the same message applies to most any relationship.  Love is always on the mind at some level; whether we long for lasting friendships or an intimate relationship, we are all thirsty for love.  The trouble is that we are humans, and we cannot love perfectly, or unconditionally, like Christ does.  Yet that is our mission. 

Guys and girls, the only way that we can fully know this love, and express this towards one another, is to be in complete surrender to God.  Allowing him to love through us, as willing servants of his perfect plan. 

I Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.   Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always, hopes, and always perseveres.

Love is patient and kind.

Surrender your will.  You can believe that love is a waiting game.  There is a time for love (especially as it relates to the opposite sex), but it is not just a waiting game.  We are simply imperfect people who are learning to love one another, and that my friends, takes patience.  When we let others down, or when others let us down, we should always respond out of patience and kindness.  How else are we to learn, how else are we to ever meet anyone’s expectations?  Just as Christ loves us, he is patiently waiting for us to understand.  He is never irritated, frustrated, or upset.  No, He kindly waits for us to know His love. 

Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Surrender your pride.  Love is not about me, and the moment it becomes that, it is no longer love.  Grace is not about us, but it is for us.  We are not saved by anything other than God’s love through grace.  We have nothing to boast about, because we do not deserve the love we are given, and still we take it for granted.

Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Surrender your emotions, feelings, and attractions.  Love is putting the condition of another’s heart above the condition of your own.  Knowing that people are imperfect, and people will disappoint, we cannot for a moment assume that we can use love for any self-gain.  The moment we do that, love becomes terribly destructive. 

 

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth.

Surrender your mind.  Love is honest, and it cannot grow in the midst of lies and manipulation.  More than anything else, love is faithful…  When God promises, He delivers.  This is the same for us, let your yes be yes, and your no be no.  Be consistent, if you say you will do something, follow through.  Likewise, do not commit to promises you cannot keep. 

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

Surrender control, it is not by our power or will that we can love someone to this magnitude without first surrendering control. This is just one of the amazing truths about God’s love, it does not expire.  God is constantly pursuing us with love, regardless of whether we choose to love Him in return.  In a relationship, we need to fully commit to loving that person in their imperfectness, just as God loves us.  Godly love looks to protect the heart and well being, just as God wishes to keep us from harm and suffering through his guidance and provision. 

What does this mean in our relationships?

When looking for relationships with the opposite sex, there is one simple truth: to be able to love anyone else, especially the one we care for the most, we must love Jesus more…  we must surrender to the Love of Christ.  As humans trying to love, there will be heartache and pain because we still struggle with sin (pride, anger, control, and selfishness), but you must commit fully to loving with the same love that Christ has for us.

Brothers and sisters in Christ, do not settle for less than God’s best.   Be in constant preparation, and do not give your heart away carelessly.  Hide it in Christ, so that when it is found it will be found and established in Him.  We have created a cycle of broken and empty relationships, and we both have to work together to break this pattern.

Brothers, pursue Christ first and foremost.  Commit to protecting the hearts of your sisters in Christ.  Stand up for them, and encourage them towards what true love is.  Only when you are in complete surrender to Jesus, should you pursue a woman’s heart.  Remember, you are to love her with the same reckless abandonment as Christ has loved you in your imperfections. 

Likewise, Sisters, pursue Christ first.  Protect your heart, do not give it away freely; stand strong in God’s promises to you.  Know your worth and value as daughters of God, and encourage your brothers in Christ to become Godly leaders.

May we love as Christ loves us, may we be in complete surrender to Him.