To be, or not to be... Intentional

I grabbed a book off my bookshelf before I left for Thanksgiving break, The Life You’ve Always Wanted by John Ortberg, I’ve had this book for years but have never made it past chapter one (may not have gotten past page one). Even though it was given to me by my friends in University Ministries I have always looked at the title and couldn’t help thinking that this was totally going to be a “self help” book, and would continue putting it aside for when my “self” needed a little more “help”.

What is that saying… “Never judge a ‘self help’ book on spiritual disciplines by its cover”? I think that’s it.

While I’ve had every intention of getting through all of the books given to me by respected friends, I’ve had this one for nearly four years. I wouldn’t even necessarily say that I’m in the “self help” mindset, I just so happened to have lent another book I was reading to friend who I thought might be inspired by it, and now I was stuck with a short break from school, and no book. Time for a little dose of “self help” I guess…

Regardless of the reasons causing me to start this book, I’ve been challenged to think about some of the early points that this book has presented. Specifically, the one that caught my attention the most, how is my spiritual health or how would I describe my spiritual life?

What defines our spiritual life? When someone asks, “How is your spiritual life?” what is the first thing that you think? Is it a list of acts or spiritual disciplines that we have or have not done recently? Maybe we just regurgitate something that we had recently read in a book, or even the Bible… but do these phrases, actions, or even inactions, truly describe the state of my spiritual life?

If you aren’t sure what actions I am referring to, let me offer a brief list: quite time, reading the Bible daily, going to church, skipping church, journaling (daily, weekly, or however often), praying… these are all things that I should do if I want to be closer to Jesus, but by saying that I do these things can I truly describe how my spiritual life is doing? Don’t get me wrong, all of these are important spiritual disciplines, but I have found that I can do all of these things and still lose sight of God. When my heart is not behind each action, I just begin to walk through the motions, hoping that these things I do will tell everyone else that I am spiritually on my game.

My most recent understanding of my spiritual life looks something like this: Instead of showing everyone how big my spiritual-daily-to-do-list is, and flexing my spiritual biceps (and essentially feeding my spiritual ego)… it is the way I interact with others, what I’ve learned from trying to complete that lengthy to-do list, or even things that I currently struggle with, that should best represent my spiritual life… If anyone is like me, we easily look past the purpose of what we are doing, and begin to just do it… That’s when these ever so important spiritual disciplines turn into a checklist.

Read my bible… check.

Prayed… check.

Prayed longer than yesterday… check!

Journaled… check.

Went to church… check.

Fellowship with both believers and non-believers… check.

Did all of this with the intent of learning more about, and growing closer to, God… ____ (yeah, workin on that one)

After I’ve completed my checklist I seem to have missed the very most important point… Intentionality! If I do all of the things on the list and fail to remember that I am His, and I am living for Him, I am just another Pharisee who’s pride has removed the greatness of God from being spiritually disciplined.

If I had to try to pinpoint my biggest distraction to my spiritual disciplines, it would have to be pride. Pride, it can be so sneaky and can easily reverse my perfectly pure and humble intentions if I’m not careful. When I am doing “great” at pursuing Jesus, I become proud of “my” accomplishments and how much I have increased my learning and understanding of Him. Then I forget I am a sinner and I still need grace, every minute of every day. That is when pride sneaks in and knocks me back.

In the end, what have I learned, what have I struggled with, whom have I showed the love of Jesus to? Those are the things that I should begin to define the current state of my spiritual life, or spiritual health. It doesn’t have to be all the things that I have done, even though we know that it is important to be spiritually disciplined and express our faith through our actions. But actions lacking intention are sure to miss the mark (sin reference). The good news is that others can challenge us when our actions become aimless and unintentional. Living intentionally can't be easy for the average, easily distracted and prideful, American... but knowing how important intentionality is for our own spiritual health and our witness has to be half the battle.

Battle on!

My new verse for an undetermined period of time-
James 4:8

Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded